Enormous Baloth Diet: I Can’t Believe How Much Weight I Lost!





Fathom Mage:
Still got a few details
of that look to work on 😉
So am I still an Enormous Baloth, or have I managed to become a Fathom Mage?
You won’t believe how much weight I lost on my Magic: The Gathering themed Enormous Baloth Diet this week!
Starting weight: 223.6lbs
Ending weight: 218.6lbs
It worked! Ok, so I may not be a Fathom Mage yet, but I found this diet easy and pleasant to follow, and still lost five pounds in a week! Why? Why?? My best guess is: no bread…?
To sum up the Enormous Baloth Diet:
It’s lots of vegetables, fruit, unprocessed whole grains, and pork.
Read the card:
Its diet consists of fruits, plants, small woodland animals, large woodland animals, woodlands, fruit groves, fruit farmers, and small cities.
Enormous Baloth: Is this the Best Magic the Gathering card for Dieters?
So here’s my food diary, but first, about that bacon:
I know bacon isn’t usually a healthy food, but I was very lucky to find the healthier ‘no added nitrates/nitrites’ bacon in a pretty good sale at the supermarket this week – it must be a sign! Still salty, but it’s an improvement 🙂

Enormous Baloth: Food! Smash!
Day 1
Breakfast: Oatmeal (jumbo porridge oats and water)
Tea & coffee
Snack: 1 apple
Lunch: Bacon, boiled potatoes and carrots
Dinner: Cajun style red beans with brown rice, carrots, celery, onion and smoked pork sausage, steamed ‘super greens’ (spinach and other healthy dark green leaves). 1 orange and 3 dried apricots.
Day 2
Tea and coffee
Breakfast: 1 banana, half a bowl of oatmeal
Lunch: Bacon fried with mixed white and shiitake mushrooms and super greens. I thought at first I might have found a new favourite food!
Snack: 1 apple
Dinner: Leftover red beans and rice, frozen mixed vegetables (peas, green beans, carrots and sweetcorn). Fruit salad (orange, banana, kiwi and strawberries).
Day 3:
Tea & coffee
Breakfast: oatmeal
Lunch: Ham and salad, apple
Snack: Banana
Dinner: Green chilli pork stew (potatoes, onions, celery, pinto beans, pork, green chillies, tomatillos, frozen pepper strips, vegetable stock, yeast extract, cumin, oregano, green salsa and fresh cilantro/coriander), with brown rice, peas and sweetcorn. 1 orange, 3 dried apricots
Day 4:
Tea & coffee
Brunch: Bacon cooked with mushrooms, tomatoes, onion and spinach. I think I have found my new favourite food 🙂
Snack: Banana
Snack: peanuts, soy nuts and brazil nuts
Dinner: leftover green chilli stew, rice
Day 5:
Tea & coffee
Breakfast: oatmeal
Snack: banana
Lunch: Ham and salad
Dinner:
Dinner ran into a bit of a technical hitch. We usually have fish tacos on Fridays, but this week I was planning to make a Mexican pork dish called carnitas to put in the tacos instead.
So I started the carnitas, but they took too long to cook and people got hungry, so we ended up having fish tacos and fruit salad first, and then carnitas later as well, when they were ready. Very tasty though!
Also a couple of squares of dark chocolate, and lots of red wine with it 🙂 Sure you could find those things in a forest, right?
Day 6 (Saturday):
Tea & coffee
Breakfast:
Oatmeal, plus I made ‘Devils on Horseback’: prunes wrapped in bacon and grilled! I’d had them before at a Halloween party and really liked them. The kids were not so keen though.
Lunch:
Carnitas and leftovers.
Dinner:
‘Cowboy dinner’, as my friend calls it: baked beans with sausages, bacon and potatoes. Now that was one that the kids did like 🙂
Also fruit salad: less of a hit, but it’s healthy!
Day 7 (Sunday):
Tea & coffee
Breakfast: oatmeal, which I left in the microwave at home and forgot to eat! So in fact, breakfast: nothing
Snack:
A few raw vegetable crudites with some ranch dip, and a pineapple chunk, followed by the rest of the leftover fruit salad when I got home ranting and raving and irritable with everyone because I was hungry 🙁
Lunch: leftovers
Dinner:
I made another new (to me!) American classic: pulled pork. This starts off with making barbecue sauce, which you’re actually meant to make the day before, then using it to baste some slow roasting pork shoulder, which you finally pull apart with forks and mix with the rest of the barbecue sauce if you don’t have a nine year old who won’t eat spicy things.
I made coleslaw to go with it (cabbage, onion, grated carrots, caraway seeds and light mayonnaise), and also baked beans and corn on the cob. It was like a cross between Sunday roast dinner and a barbecue feast – lovely, popular with all the family and a really nice way to end the week!
I think the ‘Enormous Baloth’ Diet might actually be my favourite diet so far 🙂 And it worked!
What’s your favourite diet?
Comments?
I’d love to have your comments: click here…
Links:
- Would you pay $100,000 for a playing card?
- It’s the Enormous Baloth Diet!
- Magic: The Gathering Card Database
- Carnitas recipe from Leite’s Culinaria
I didn’t have any lard, so I used vegetable oil. I didn’t have condensed milk either, but couldn’t think of anything to substitute for that so I just left it out. - North Carolina style Barbecue Sauce Recipe
- Devils on Horseback, from Martha Stewart. I keep my house just like hers 😉
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